children are allowed to get mad too...

Assalamualaikum, readers.
tonight (it's 7.30 pm here), i would like to share a YouTube video with all of you. This is something different, something i've never tried before. 
i want you guys to watch the video by clicking on the link below and after that, read through the rest of the entry.
Click the link below:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WOlpdd7y8MI

so, what do you think of the video? was it funny or was it heartbreaking watching kids cry in front of the camera?

first of all, this video was up on Facebook a long time ago, but the comments i read on the page was very rude and i thought of writing this entry a few months ago, but i was so caught up with my students' life, i had no time to write about it.

Some of the comments i read when the video was shared include, "the kids behave like their parents" and "if the kids are rude, the parents are just the same"

You see, i have a different opinion.
imagine yourself as the kid, dressed up for hours in the evening, put on a heavy costume that makes you feel hot and sweaty inside, walking from house to house seeking for some candies. Some parents only give their children an hour or so to Trick-Or-Treat. 
there's still chances of knocking on a cranky neighbour's door that shoos them off.
and they come back, tired from all the walking and happy for a bag full of candies.
for once, they feel like they've earned something in life.
it's just candies, but it still feels like earning money. you go through a lot of hardship in one night and get a whole bucket of candies. 
and they can't even eat the candies because it already so late, and the parents would rush them to bed. 
the very next day, the parents let them know they've ate all of the candies! what??

yes, they have the right to get mad. it has nothing to do with how the parents bring up the kids. children are allowed to get frustrated and sad and EXPRESS them. it's not wrong.
but of course, the kids who were so happy that their parents ate all their candies might have some reasons not to get upset. maybe they didn't have any favourite candies in their bucket, maybe Trick-or-Treating weren't that nice after all. we'd never know. or maybe they just don't care. 
thing is, kids shouldn't be blamed just for feeling upset and expressing them to their parents. 
Thanks...

pre-marriage guidelines

Assalamualaikum, readers. how are you guys doing?
InsyaAllah, i hope all of you are in god health. I'm doing fine here.
i know lately, i've been talking about kids and marriage, but it doesn't mean anything. it's just that i have lots of ideas on this topic right now.

my entry this time is about pre-marriage guidelines, according to Islam. 
Islam educates us to find out more about our going-to-be lifetime partner by asking people about the other half. 
for example, Mr G likes Miss K and he goes around asking Miss K's friends or neighbours about what's she like, does she cook, is she good with the elders, is she working...stuff like that. and if Mr G is satisfied with the answers, then the next step could be taken, engagement. usually, these information about the groom or bride would be the job of the parents and family members. *they seem to have more reliable 'sources'* 
however, there is some limits set by Islam. you can't ask too many questions, because that is not good, like you don't respect the other as a person. 
you don't ask questions like what time does she wake up in the morning or does she sing in the shower. that's rude. the whole point of getting some information about the other half is just a rough idea if she's a nice person, suitable to be your other half. 
what if we skip this step?
i watched a movie with my family the other day, Killers, starred by Ashton Kutcher and Katherine Heigl. in the movie, these two met in France and fell in love instantly. They spent the whole week with each other and Katherine brought him home to meet her parents. He told them he was a pilot, but he actually kill people for a living. Katherine didn't know this and got married to him anyways. After three years, people around them tried to kill him and Katherine felt like she was cheated and betrayed for three years. 
Moral of the story?
if Katherine would have followed the guidelines in Islam as above, she would ask around and see if he was really a pilot, is he still a pilot, and which company does he works for. information like previous jobs, does he own a car, does he have any family can only be obtained if you have sources. 

I hope you get the relevance of this entry. things like this only make me appreciate the reasons why Islam is so particular in everything. it may sound troublesome, but there's always a good reason behind it.
I would like to stress that these things can be applied even if you're a non-Muslim. this isn't a prayer, they're just some guidelines and you can follow them if you think it's good for you. no harm done.
Thanks for reading and happy marrying!

down on one knee

Assalamualaikum, readers.
Tonight, i am not in the mood. i have so many things to do, but after putting my sleep aside, i managed to finish a couple of things on my To-do list. but i still have dinner and some reading to do for tomorrow's class on my list. yet, i have some time to update my blog. *smacks face*
i was scrolling down Facebook when i saw an image which gave me an idea on this entry.

so, that was the image. what's going through your mind right now?

"One of the reasons why i want my husband to propose in front of my family members" was what went through my brain.

i actually told my mum this and she asked me back, why would i want my husband to propose in front of her and the rest of the family.

my answer: it's a proof that i'm not making it up.

she laughed.

i don't need a spy-photographer who hides in the bush to snap this beautiful moment. i have my family members to always remind me of the beautiful moment.

That's all! bye!

what about Time-out?

Assalamualaikum readers.
I know its a little too early to talk about kids, since i'm nowhere near marriage, heck i haven't even found my Mr Right. *buries face in a pillow and sobs*
anyways, i've been reading on a material, its "Aku Terima Nikahnya" which means "I Accept the Marriage/Nikaah" written by the famous blogger, Ustaz Hasrizal. 
before you go any further with your thoughts, the reason i'm reading it in the first place is because my sister told me his writing is very nice. 
in this book, the Ustaaz mentioned a lot of things, besides marriage. One of them is children. In the book, the Ustaaz explained on how he raises his kids, and from his writing, i can see his kids are brilliant. i've been watching some people with kids raise their child, and i can't help but to think on how will i raise my kids when the time comes. 
one of my seniors raised her daughter in such way that she cries when Daddy beats her hand if the kid does anything wrong. and the kid would cry, and not repeat herself in the future. 
it was a different story with a boy who just laughed, when his mother beats his hand and told him his actions was wrong. instead of apologizing, the boy just ran away, laughing. 
WHOA! watching things like this make me wonder if my kids would respect me as a mother and really take my words at heart. 
i know that we can't raise our kids like our parents' raise us because it's a different era. the way i was brought up, our favourite things get confiscated by Mak if we do something wrong. and the ONLY way to earn back the item is to behave for a whole week or a month and get good results in the exams. if not, the favourite item will remain in her hands forever! *Mak's evil laugh* 
I know i can totally apply Mak's ways, but not so early as 2 years. kids don't know anything at that time. 

which made me turn to what Western's do to their kids. TIME OUT! i learnt this by watching endless episodes of Take Home Nanny on Astro once upon a time. well, that nanny always punish kids who do something wrong by asking the kid to sit on a chair, far away from everybody else for about 10 minutes. She'll ask the kid to think about their actions. she'll come back and check on them after time-out, and see if the kid has learnt his lesson. if the kid finally got back to his senses, the nanny would explain that his actions was wrong and ask him to apologize. then, the kid has to promise not to repeat his actions, or he'll have to go through Time-out again.
what if the kid runs off?

Emma Jenner, the nanny

the nanny would catch the kid and make him sit on the chair again. no ropes to keep him on the chair, just hold him on the chair until he calms down.
smart!
i told my mum a couple of times about this and she said, maybe i should give it a shot. after all, Western's kids' turn out to be more matured and intelligent at such young age. 
okay, it's past midnight, and i have lecture first thing in the morning.
Happy trying!
~there's nothing wrong in trying something from the Western countries, as long as it's something good and beneficial. Peace!

P/S: one of the reasons i'm so motivated is because we share the same name. if she can do it, so can i!

karat

entry kali nie akan ditulis dalam bahasa Melayu. mungkin sebab 'straight from the heart' la kot. 

ema tengah baca Quran tadi, terdetik untuk mengaji lepas solat. masa tengah mengaji tu, perasan yang ema banyak baca salah. kalau ikut hati, memang nak stop kat satu page and resume nanti2. tapi terpikir.

"kalau aku berhenti kat sini, makin erkarat la mengaji aku"

"aku guarantee ka sat lagi aku baca Quran?" 

persoalan2 ni membuatkan ema continue baca Quran. satu lagi page. bacaan semakin okay, walaupun semput dan bacaan jadi slow sebab tengah fikir dalam otak macam mana nak sebut kalimah2 Allah.

Moral of the story:

kalau sedar diri tu berkarat, dalam apa2 urusan sekalipun, itu tandanya kita kena rajin polish, kasi hilang karat.